“Gus”

02Nov08

He awoke shivering to the feeling of an ant scrambling across the rugged terrain that was his face…he lay there, just feeling it’s tiny legs feel their way across his pitted unshaven cheek.  He slowly put his hand up to his face and let the little creature find it’s way to his finger and climb up. He held his finger in front of his face watching the frantic actions of the little insect as it spiraled and zigzagged around his finger. Then he slowly he brought his thumb and finger together until they just pinched the ant enough to stop him from running…the ant struggled and clawed to get free snipping with his little pinchers. Gus frowned and put the ant close to his ear, “what’s that little buddy? You want me to cut you a break? Well now… I figger I am cuttin you a break. I  mean you could have walked all the way across my face and down my arm to get where you are now, but I saved you a whole heap of walking now didn’t I. He clenched his jaw as an angry frown stretched across his face. Gus pressed his finger and thumb together until his fingernails turned white, then he rubbed them together and watched the little pieces of ant fall to his chest then he glared skyward and shot his middle finger up at the sky. Gus figured getting struck dead for  shooting God the bird, couldn’t be much worse than living in the squalor he did now. He was pretty much burnt out on God, and people that claimed God is Love… He hadn’t found this to be anywhere near accurate at this stage in his life, if it could be classified as such. Gus thought if God really was the creator and all, He should be able to deal with a little bit of sarcasm from His creations without losing his temper. Gus always said “Wouldn’t be much of a God or a man if He got all bent out of shape when folks get mad at Him, would he?” And Gus put his theory to the test on a regular basis. Gus’s current residence was nothing more than an old RV storage facility comprised of a concrete slab, a roof and only 2 walls. Gus  Gus looked up at the orange glow of the security light hanging from a tilted old pole in front of the building. It was still early. He sat up and wrapped his sleeping bag around his bony shoulders. He looked around and realized why the ant was on his face. There was water almost all the way up to his sleeping bag. Only a small patch of dry concrete remained around him. Gus looked around the garage and nodded his head with satisfaction. He had predicted it would rain, not that it mattered, there was no one to predict to, but he had, and it had… and he had placed his sleeping bag right here figuring it would be the highest spot…and it was. Gus stuck his hand in his jeans pocket and pulled out a bent cigarette and a pink BIC. He tenderly ran his fingers up the cigarette to straighten it. finally satisfied, he planted it in his lips and lit it up, closing his eyes and inhaling deeply the sweet painfully cheap, acrid, lifeblood. He felt its power course through his veins and slowly exhaled through his nostrils. He rummaged through a dirty canvas bag and pulled out a package of orange cheese crackers. He was pretty sure the clerk at the 7/11 had seen him pocket them, but he put on his pitiful face and kept walking. She never stopped him, and now he knew where to go. He sucked on the dry crackers until they dissolved in his mouth, then he found his bottle in the bag and slowly unscrewed the lid, letting the air escape with a hiss. He took a slow trickling pull on it feeling the burning fizz of  the night cooled Coke tracing down his throat. Gus leaned forward and looked around the edge of the garage, over the top of two buildings and just sticking out past the edge of another to the bank sign. all he could see was the first number on it. It was “3” something. Gus stood up and pressed his eyes tightly together as he straightened his back and groaned. He felt like a horse trying to ward off flies as his skin quivered in in the cold. He rolled up his sleeping bag and stuffed it in his canvas bag. He looked around to make sure no one was watching, then he took the long stick lying on the floor nearby and put the straps of the canvas bag on a broken stub of a branch. He lifted the bag up into the rafters of the garage and hooked the straps on a nail at the peak of the roof. Gus would keep sleeping here until there was a reason to leave. It was rare to find a good spot like his that someone else on the streets hadnt already claimed. Gus made sure his bag was safe and then took off walking. He squeezed through the chain link gate in front of the garage. The gate was was chained together loosely enough for him to straddle the chain and wriggle through the gap. Then he started off down the street. He didn’t have anywhere particular to go, he would just wander until something came to him. He shook his head at himself as he realized he was trying to trick himself again. He always started off telling himself he had nothing particular in mind to do, but as he walked he kept finding himself fingering the silver tube in his pocket, looking this way and that for someone to give him what he needed. He had tried to quit the stuff, but somehow he couldn’t toss the pipe… it was the last shred of control he had in his life. It represented his only goal in life… to get some money, so he could get a rock.  As it turned out, keeping the pipe hadn’t been the best idea, now he needed to score or he was going to go crazy. Gus crossed the street and started to turn down a well traveled alley when he noticed a Police car approaching him straight on… Gus didn’t turn into the alley, but continued straight, gripping the tube in his pocket tightly. The car got just beside him. Gus moved just his eyes too see who it was. Officer Maguire slowly rolled past. Gus just kept walking not looking back or changing his pace, just kept walking. The car turned down a street and drove out of sight. The officer would make the block and be back. He knew Gus, and he knew what he was up to at this time of night. Officer Maguire stopped Gus on a regular basis. Most times He didn’t find anything on Gus, but there had been enough times of him finding a little rock or the pipe, that the officer knew he was good for at least some info on the local dealers. Gus cooperated and helped the officer just enough to keep him guessing, but not quite enough to actually be useful. Gus didn’t care if the Cop arrested him or not, he had grown in a strange way, almost fond of going to jail. It wasn’t like it was keeping him from something important, and it was a dry relatively warm place to sleep. Head lights illuminated Gus as a car approached him from behind. Once again, Gus didn’t change his pace or look back, but just kept walking. He waited for the moment. Then just as he walked past a light post he pulled the pipe from his pocket and in one smooth motion, turned his body as if to look behind him, and flicked the metal pipe into the grass along the sidewalk. Officer Maguire stopped his car and got out, flooding Gus with spot lights from his car. Gus put on his innocent smile and put his hands on top of his head as the officer approached him. “Mornin officer.” Gus drawled congenially.
“Hey Gus, what are ya doing over here man? I thought you were quittin?”
“Im just going to a friends house sir.” Gus knew the cop didn’t believe him… it didn’t really matter, it was just what he always said…
“Got anything in your pocket you shouldn’t have Gus?”
“Nah, not tonight sir, you can look if ya want.” The officer motioned for Gus to step to his car and together they performed the dance they had both danced countless times. Gus put his hands on the car, the cop quickly brushed down his pockets and pulled out the crushed empty cigarette pack, and the lighter, then put them back, then pulled a yellow cap from a coke bottle, that had “YOU WIN” stamped inside of it… “Hey this one is a winner Gus!” The cop laughed and put under Gus’s hand on the hood. “Alright Gus, you’re free to go, Ill catch ya next time.” Gus and Officer Maguire both knew that statement was more than just a friendly farewell. The Officer turned his spot lights off and Gus walked on alone into the night, leaving his pipe in the grass where it lay.

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